#G4 in My Macabre McMorbidly Family Portrait Series
The wife of Prof. Quanticus, dear Aunt Luvina inherited her love of self-beauty from her parents, Lord and Lady Lastic. It used to take 150 clothes pins pulling at the back of her head for a make-at-home face lift. It also took 50 rounds of plastic surgery for this amateur beautician to achieve this epicly terrifying facade of grim-filled grace. Her husband’s travels afforded her the most exotic beauty products imaginable. However, the results were highly questionable. One could only stare at her reflection in her boutique mirror, not because you’d turn to stone but because staring at her directly in the face caused simultaneous involuntary bladder and bowel evacuation.
The McMorbidly Family Portraits were discovered in a battered and moldy sealed trunk, which had somehow wound up below the root system of a huge black tree on the grounds of McMorbidly Manor (Now in Ruins). With each photo was a mysterious description written in jittery script by persons unknown. The portraits and paper were dated back to the mid to late 1800's. Who was the artist/photographer? How had history forgotten such an infamous and lengthy family legacy? We may never know but pay close attention as each family member and their stories from all their past generations are revealed!